Kids are SUPPOSED to be immature, right?

Well, yes and no.

Yes, they are kids and therefore, by definition, they are immature.

No, they are not supposed to stay that way forever. And it's our job as parents to guide them into maturity of some sort.

We help our kids move ever towards a more mature mindset in a couple of distinct ways.

• One, we model it ourselves, as adults.
• Two, we intentionally tell our kids what behaviors we expect of them as they grow and then we set up ways for them to practice those behaviors and experience the consequences of NOT practicing those behaviors.

Depending upon many factors, such as a child's temperament, how well maturity is modeled by the significant adults in a child's life, whether or not values are VALUED in front of the child, and how consistently the consequences are enforced, a child will move towards maturity.

The goal is to keep giving out more freedom, in little dribbles, as a child grows, as payment for the amount of responsibility (maturity) a child is taking on as he grows. Yes, I believe a child EARNS his freedom. And that's good news for a child, because it puts him squarely in the driver's seat for the privileges he wants.

Now all of this becoming second nature takes a long, long time (can you say "lifetime"?), but a HUGE part of it needs to be accomplished before a child is ready to fly the nest.

Is your child growing, steadily, in maturity?